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A Mother to Love (Love Inspired) Page 14
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At the end of that call, he’d contacted his caseworker from Friend of the Court. Having a woman assigned to his case had given him a bad vibe, but he’d found her able to listen and weigh decisions fairly. Today she’d listened and suggested getting together with Glenda and him to talk it over. Rick prayed the woman really understood his concern. Next he had to wait and see if Glenda would meet with the caseworker and him.
Carly ambled into the room, looking lost. “Aren’t we going to Angie’s?”
“I’m giving her a break.”
A quizzical expression crept across her face. “A break from us?”
He managed to grin. “We’ll see her later, okay?”
She sank onto the sofa. “I guess I’ll have to wait.” She folded her arms across her chest with a forlorn expression that made him chuckle. He hurried to her and scooped her into his arms. Carly wiggled as she laughed.
The house phone rang, breaking the fun, and he had to set her down. “You wait there.” He slipped into the kitchen for the wall phone. Before he answered he spotted Glenda’s phone number on the caller ID. He closed his eyes and picked up the receiver.
Before he could speak she began her tirade. “I can’t believe you want to waste my time with that caseworker. Who is she? No one that matters since I’ve already talked to my attorney. He thinks you’re selfish and ridiculous. So do I. If you don’t cooperate in four days, I’ll have to see you in court. Time’s running out, Rick.”
“Glenda, do you really want to do that? Do you want Carly dragged into this? We can’t do that to her.”
A sarcastic laugh flew across the line. “If you really care about your daughter being dragged into court, then sign the forms.” She hung up.
His heart in his throat, he lowered the receiver and stood a moment to get his bearings. The situation made him sick. She’d done what he feared and placed the blame on him. His breathing grew labored, like an engine chugging up a hill. He closed his eyes. Lord, I need help.
Angie’s face glowed in his mind. He needed to talk, but with Carly it was always difficult.
Gathering his wits, he managed a neutral expression and strode back into the living room. Carly still lay on the floor, but she’d devised some kind of game that seemed to involve exercises. “I saw this on TV, Daddy. See.” She rolled onto her belly and attempted a push-up. After a moment she got the hang of it and pushed herself from the floor for an instant before sinking back down. “I’m bored.”
“What about all your puzzles and—”
“I left them at Angie’s.” She gave him a melt-his-heart look. “Can we go there now?” When he didn’t respond, she rose and wrapped her arms around him. “Please.”
He wouldn’t be good company with so much on his mind, but he agreed to call and see if they could come. She clung to him as he hit the number and waited. Finally he heard Angie’s hello.
Her tone gave him concern. “Did I interrupt something?”
“No, not really. I hadn’t given thought to dinner, and now I’ll have to go out and pick up some groceries.”
His mind snapped. “Here’s a thought. I’d like to run an errand without Carly. Why don’t you two go out to dinner on me? You’d be doing me a favor and how about letting me know where. Maybe I can join you. If not, I’ll see you back at your house. Will that work?”
“Sure, Rick.”
Her response didn’t sound totally convincing.
“But what’s up?”
He’d feared she’d ask, with Carly hanging on to every word. “Carly’s anxious to see you, so we can talk about it later, okay?”
Her faint chuckle warmed him. “I get it. That’s fine. I’ll see you shortly, and it works out well for me. I want to buy a few things for kids to play with when they’re here, and Carly can help me pick out some things.”
“Ang, you don’t have to do—”
“Have to has nothing to do with it. I want to. See you shortly.”
No point in trying to convince her otherwise. He said goodbye and gave Carly a nod. “Okay, get ready. You and Angie are going shopping and I think out to dinner.”
She bounded from his lap and skipped out of the kitchen without a sound except for her giggles.
What a woman. Angie rolled with every request. She didn’t insist it go her way. He found her refreshing, and now he hoped that El had a few minutes to talk. He longed to gain the man’s wise counsel, but before he arrived there, he wanted to pray.
Carly shot into the living room before he could think. “Ready. Let’s go.”
He slipped his arm around her shoulders, and they walked out the front door and headed to his car. Carly prattled on about dinner and shopping and seeing Kimmy, leaving him no time to talk with the Lord. Without a minute of silence, he pulled in front of Angie’s house, leaving her driveway free, and parked. Carly snapped off her seat belt and was out of the booster seat in a shot.
Angie stood in the front door and opened her arms as Carly darted up the porch steps. When Angie stepped out, she wrapped Carly in her arms. “I missed you.”
“I missed you, too.” Her smile wrenched through his chest. The weight of his mess with Glenda had nearly laid him low, but the horrible moment hit him with another warning. What would he and Carly do if she said goodbye? What would she do? Wither and die? The thought came without warning as distress drained his energy. “Lord, I do need help.”
Rick slipped from the car and made his way up the sidewalk, forcing a bounce into his step and a smile that made his cheeks ache.
Angie’s look said what he feared. She didn’t believe the smile. The woman was uncanny.
She touched his hand. “Talk later, okay?”
He could only nod. “Have fun, and I may join you sooner than expected. I’m hoping to talk with El. The man has a special knack, and I want to bounce my thoughts off someone.”
She nodded. “I understand, and I approve. Unbiased and wise.”
“When he didn’t join us for pizza the other day, I told him I owed him. Maybe I’ll take him out tonight.” He studied her expression.
She tilted her head and kissed his cheek. “We’ll go to Greg and Lou’s. You know where that is?”
“I do. I’ll call you if I’m coming. If not, I’ll see you when we’re done.” He wanted to kiss her. It seemed forever but Carly was too close and he feared she wouldn’t understand.
He waited while she locked the house and he waved to them as they pulled down the street. Then he drew up his shoulders and headed down the block.
* * *
Angie leaned back, pleased that she’d stumbled on Greg and Lou’s Restaurant. Though a down-home style establishment with wallpaper and lacy curtains filled with booths and tables, she loved their home-cooked fare and the fast and friendly service. She watched Carly finish the last of her spaghetti from their children’s menu, winding the pasta around her fork. It made her grin. Simple pleasures that only children would appreciate. If only she could find as much fun in the simple things.
Her dinner special, chicken fettuccine with Alfredo sauce, had been excellent, with a creamy sauce and tasty pieces of poultry, but she faltered, recalling that Carly had her eye on their strawberry shortcake. The dessert appeared to be ice cream between two round cakes covered in berries and topped with a pile of whipped cream.
The memory took her back to her days as a child and looking forward to her mom’s treats. If Carly became her stepdaughter, she would find delight in preparing surprises for her and teaching her more about cooking so she would become a loving mother, too. Mother? An image rose again of tucking her in bed and kissing her good-night. Though she loved the idea, the possibility seemed unreal, too wonderful to come true. “Ready for dessert, or are you too full?” She studied Carly’s expression and had to bite her lip to keep from laughing. Carly’s express
ion made it clear she was full but she was not one to give up a treat.
“I have a little room. Can we share?”
She winked. “Sharing is fun, and we’ll get on with our shopping.”
“To buy yard toys?” Carly’s eyes twinkled.
“I think we need a couple of things, don’t you?”
Carly tittered as a smile filled her face. “I’m lucky, Angie, ’cause I have two homes.”
“You do.”
She lowered her eyes a moment, then lifted them as if she had something she wanted to say but was afraid to.
“What’s wrong, sweetheart?”
“Can I tell you a secret? A real secret?” Her comment came out in halted spurts.
A secret. The word caught in her throat. How could she keep something from Rick if it were something serious? But Carly needed someone. She drew in a breath. “What about your daddy?”
She lifted one shoulder. “I feel bad telling.”
“Okay. I’ll keep your secret...unless it’s something that might hurt you or—”
“This won’t hurt me.” A faint grin flickered on her face.
“Tell me. I’ll keep your secret.”
Carly looked relieved. “I have two homes, but...I like my daddy’s the best. I can’t tell my mother because she would be sad.”
Angie’s heart flinched. She understood Carly’s predicament. Rick would be thrilled but her mother certainly wouldn’t, and with Carly’s comment, her concern rose. She longed to know if Carly knew of her mother’s trip and her plan to take Carly along. Still, she couldn’t ask, even though it broke her heart. “You don’t have to tell your mom, Carly. Your dad would be happy to hear you say that, but if you don’t feel comfortable telling him then it can be our secret.”
She nodded, a look of relief spreading across her face. “I really love to come to my dad’s now ’cause you’re with us, and you’re fun and like to be with me.”
“Your daddy loves to be with you.”
“I know, and my mom does, but she always has to work too much. Even when she’s home she wants me to be quiet so she can work.”
A sigh escaped her as she listened to the five-year-old bearing the weight of the world. “Adults have to work. That’s hard on families sometimes, Carly. I know you wish she could spend more time with you.”
She gave a big nod. “Daddy works, but he always spends time with me.”
Angie didn’t have an answer, and rather than making a placating comment, she didn’t respond.
With no mention of the upcoming trip, she decided to let it go, and when the waitress arrived, they dug into the delicious strawberry shortcake. With a full belly, she paid the bill and they headed for the supercenter to look for outdoor games.
Carly jiggled in the back like a jumping jack tied to her chair, and Angie finally couldn’t hold back her laughter. “You had too much sugar.”
“No, I’m just happy to go shopping and look for toys.”
“We’re almost there.” And it had to be soon before she kicked a hole in the back of the passenger seat. Angie grinned at seeing Carly in a confined situation.
After Angie arrived, she and Carly slipped from the car and made their way into the store and down the aisles until they spotted the games and toys.
“Let’s get a ball.” Carly bounded along the aisle, passing the boccie ball sets.
“Carly, look at these.”
She studied the eight colorful balls. “I think we need a bigger ball than those.”
Angie grinned. “This is a game.” She explained the game and put the boccie set into her basket.
After she’d selected a ring-toss game and the bigger ball, Carly was satisfied. Angie’s dreams became more vivid. She pictured what it would be like to have Carly in her life always. The child brought her joy just as Rick had done. She could no more dislodge the image than she could walk away from Rick and Carly. They both had become her world. Her dilemma grew stronger, and she knew the past had to be brought into the open. Rick’s faith had taught her that in the Lord there was hope, and that was what she needed to trust.
As they headed toward the checkout, Carly’s questioning look roused her from her thoughts. Before she could divert her curiosity, Carly stopped beside a display of luggage. “Did Daddy tell you my mom’s going on another trip?”
She slowed to a halt, her heart in her throat as she decided how to answer. She settled on the truth. “He did. Your mom’s going to Germany, I think.”
“For weeks.” She gave Angie a plaintive look. “That’s too long.”
Struggling for a noncommittal response, she realized what she had to say. “You’ll miss her, but the time will pass fast.”
“I can’t miss her.”
Angie tried to stop her jaw from sagging. “You can’t?”
“She wants me to go with her.” A troubled look washed over her face. “I don’t know—”
Angie couldn’t make her mouth move. She stared at the child, heart in her throat knowing she had to say something, but not having the words to speak. Instead she knelt at her side and took her in her arms. “We’ll see, sweetheart.” She rubbed her back and held her tight, hoping that her action would help the child know that she was loved. After a few strange looks from customers, she eased up and scooted Carly in front of her. “Help me push the basket. Your daddy is waiting for us to get back.”
Carly smiled at her, and she had all she could do to keep from sobbing.
* * *
Rick pushed the plate holding the rest of his chicken stew aside and leaned back while he listened to El sharing stories of the good old days and especially of his wife. Rick longed to be blessed with a marriage filled with the kind of love El and his wife seemed to have shared. Somehow they’d segued from his own tale of woe about Glenda’s plans for Carly in Europe to marriage in general. He hated to reintroduce his problem, but that was why he’d come.
El cleaned up the last of his goulash with a thick piece of bread and then rested his back on the bench and grinned. “I haven’t forgotten about your problem, Rick. I’m thinking about what Jesus would do in your situation. My conclusion is this. Our job is to raise our children with common sense and with love. But that still doesn’t answer your question, does it?”
Before Rick could speak, El continued, his eyes twinkling. “So let me give you some things to think about. There’s a verse somewhere, I think in Deuteronomy, that says you should teach your children and talk to them in your house, and when you walk together and when you lie down, and when you rise. Now, I know we are to teach them about the Lord, but I think God wants us to teach more than scripture. We can teach them about life, too.” He frowned and then turned to Rick. “What do you say?”
“In full agreement, El.”
“But did you hear what the scripture says? ‘And talk to them in your house.’” He tilted his head. “Did you talk to Carly about this problem? See what she wants and then weigh it against what common sense tells us. Ask yourself what is the best for her.”
“I haven’t. But I have a reason. I don’t know if her mother has told her what she has up her sleeve, and I’m afraid if Glenda and I can’t resolve this on our own, Carly will be dragged through the court system. You know sometimes they talk with the child to see what they prefer.”
“Are you afraid of what she might want?”
Shame crept along his spine. Maybe it was his fear, but... “I’m not sure if that’s my concern or if I don’t want her to face a judge and feel cornered with both of her parents staring at her waiting for her response.”
El nodded. “I understand what you’re worried about, but I think the judge and other representatives talk with her privately. You and—what’s her name?—Glenda wouldn’t be there. Still, I can’t blame you for not wanting to put her throug
h that.”
Rick gave a faint nod, his mind trailing off in a multitude of directions. He’d avoided an even deeper concern that worried him. Was Angie’s attraction to Carly more than her feelings for him? Shame jabbed his senses. He should love the idea that Angie had a deep love for his daughter. But he wanted to be loved as deeply in her heart. His fear stayed embedded in his thoughts. He couldn’t bring that up today. Maybe never. He signaled the waitress for the bill, and when it arrived they rose and headed for the SUV.
As Rick pulled away from the restaurant, El continued as if he hadn’t been interrupted. “I’ve been thinking. Proverbs makes a better point. ‘Even a child makes himself known by his acts.’ Watch how she acts as she faces the situation. Behavior often says more than words.”
His pulse hitched. “You’ve made a point. Carly’s feelings can be seen especially from her expressions. It makes sense to learn what I can that way.”
El patted Rick’s shoulder. “I’m glad to hear it. Do you realize how long it’s been since I raised children? Mine are older than you are, so it’s been a long time.”
Rick couldn’t help but grin. “Scripture is old, El, but it’s still full of wisdom.”
El chuckled. “So here’s my final thought. We know for those who love God all things work together for good. Keep that in mind. I know you’re a good father, Rick, and you’ll do the right thing. Lean on the Lord and add a bit of common sense with the love you have for your daughter. What’s best for Carly? That’s what you have to ask yourself. That’s what’s important.”
And it was. He knew El was right. “Thanks. Remember the next time you offer to lend your ear someone may take you up on it.” Rick patted his chest. “See what happened with me?”
El laughed again. “But I got a good meal in payment and a good time with a new friend. So, Rick, I still mean it. I’m here if you need me.” He gave him a wink. “And I think that lovely lady down the block is always there for you, too.”